oh. i have shed light on current events, but forgot to bring any closure to past ones! my most waxless apologies!
BFAF outcome: enlightening.
i didnt sell a thing. there wasnt a lot of people coming through, so no one really did well (except those who had kid-friendly and/or cheap items). confirmed to me though that i dont really want to price my work high even though my friends and family think i should be able to. but honestly, i like the idea that normal people should be able to have those things that speak to them - isnt that why i do this? i only want to find something that causes you to stop and be moved in some way. how dare i keep you from taking hold of that moment in your daily life? i should just give it to you!
anywho.
i learned how not to set up that 10x10 space, two different ways not to. so next time (if there is one), i will try something a third way! i tried to have art on two sides of my partitions, nope. that just creates awkward narrow places that no one wants to walk into. i'm going to just have it open, w/ the art on the three outer walls, and i will stand in the middle w/ my easel and paint, care to watch? that way we both get to have a little fun! maybe for a dollar i'll paint your face. 50 cents? ok, ok, a quarter. you drive a hard bargain! how 'bout this, quarter/ side of face. so a whole face is 50 cents. ...fine, i can see you dont care...i'll move on.
the artists around me were great, lady to my right was one of the organizers, to my right was a woman about my own age, and across from me another lady who both of them were veteran 10x10 booth sellers. we got to chat quite a bit since there weren't gobs of people begging us to take their money. i really liked one of the pieces across from me, giant leaves and drippy paint lines in fantastic blues and greens. gorgeous!

another event that's come and gone was my meet-up group's little expo. i didnt realize how much work we had created over our short time of meeting! i had a blast organizing them into groupings. once everything was up on the walls and in the hallway it looked nearly professional. nearly. the others brought food and set up the tables with fall colored cloths. that drab room may never look so good again! the plan is to do it annually...we'll see if i'm around for the next one this fall.

why? well, because i'm thinking about moving. i have already pictured myself loading up my car - then pausing to consider if any clothes will fit too. it's not set in stone yet, but i sure look forward to the extreme change it boasts! who knows, i might get to experience seasons - all four of them - in order no less! when you grow up in a place where half of the trees drop their leaves in the spring, and a frost can come right after some late blossoms have opened, knowing the correct order is a strange experience to consider.

children's faces can quickly look like old men.

i'm aiming to be an illustrator! a dear friend has asked me to create the drawings for her children's book (though the twist at the end makes it more for the adults in their lives). it's going to be a great challenge, i'm rather excited about it. it requires learning how to draw children's proportions, which i've never done...and figuring out how to draw some things that no one knows what they look like... kid's faces are hard, the subtle expressions are very picky! you look at your reference, that faces is smiling - you look at what you've drawn, and wonder why they look like they're about to cry. fine lines everywhere, you're bound to cross one if not all of them!
i hope she doesnt mind it will take me a while. quite some time has gone by since i really pushed my artistic boundaries! i need that kind of thing, we all do. it's one thing to try something i've never done out of my own curiosity, but another entirely different to try it for someone else - what if i visualize and produce something that isnt at all like what is in her head? i know how i feel when the few things i have a final vision for dont turn out right. it means i start over, or at least start nearly over, and try again. or it means it sits there for a while, perhaps even a long while, till i feel motivated to try again. may God grant me inspiration! that's when the outcomes are always best. that's when i look back at a piece and think, "hey that's actually good!"

some things will happen soon, while some may never

well! i'm about to embark on my first 'show'... BFAF, a juried event that will be in oct. i'll be setting up my 10x10 booth space and really hoping the people that come like what i do...because, what would be the point of hoping they dont?
anyway.
this is my first official round of deadlines and requirements! i'm nervous and excited.
i still need to sew the pieces for my teal tablecloth, which i will put my antique suitcases on, w/ jewelry and such inside. hm, and black or clear zip-ties to put the framed pieces up with onto the grid stand i've made. oh, what about the canvases? wire 'em. ok. yes, i'm thinking out loud to you, i hope you dont mind. sometimes the onlooker doesnt realize how much goes into a simple production, so maybe that's why i'm letting you in on it.
if you had asked me even a year ago if i'd be trying to make sure i could do financial transactions on my cell phone, i would have looked at you crooked and w/ raised eyebrow. why does honesty not rank high in, well, any category of our society? i mean, why should a person be skeptical of checks? i'm probably one of the few people who live in a 'no debt is best' mentality. like right now, i have a little bit (though i guess i'm technically able to pay it) and it kinda bothers me. hm, seems my parenthetical is more telling than i'd like it to be, am i such a miser? interesting. see, this is why i'm doing this blog! i've just revealed that i love money.
drat.
i guess i should go ahead and finish it off then, so i can not be bothered by either thought! ...it's just nice to know i have a buffer in a country that shifts and sways everyday. interesting that we are still one of the most stable. maybe we are, maybe we're not. but we act like we are, so i guess that's how we get away with it! i'm so ready for voting season to be over! national politics is like a bug bite.
back to art! art is much more fun. art is my freedom. my ship to sail, my sky, and yet my earth, my solid place. solitude is my canvas. not sure where to go w/ that thought, but it came to mind and i like it. i do seem to find more clarity in quiet times, when i can be in my head w/out disrupted flow of thought. it's not often i really take advantage of those times. i'm house sitting, and i've not turned on the tv...were i at home, in the moment of pressing boredom or flighty distraction i'd grab the remote and bam - several hours - gone. and no blog entry, no poems, no restoration. amazes me how we do things that we know kill us inside.
like not drinking enough water. how do i manage that? i even like water. i'm not one of those, "i dont like water therefore i drink anything that is the opposite of water and cause people to wonder why i'm still alive" types. i just dont think about it. could prolly count the days i've not had chapped lips on one hand. if i could stay hydrated my mind would likely be sharper, and i wouldnt be so easily distracted...and my blog wouldnt feel like a butterfly dipping and floating to so many different flowers, and hardly landing on any of them. it's a theory anyway! you'll know if i get that sorted, i'll have a logical book published that would talk about it.

(e)motion. move me.

3 words i try to keep in my sight are: diligent, capable, and relentless
diligent - because that is something i lack, but fervently desire
capable - to remind myself that i can _____. beginning perhaps, with diligence.
relentless - this one was added most recently, by a dear fb friend (who i pray may be a true friend someday, though her honesty and transparency lead me to forget she isnt already). we are to work hard, and rest well. but i often let myself slide when it comes to difficult things, like diligence. so i punctuate it with relentlessness. we have to give ourselves permission to do that, so that we do not find our souls misreading it as self-debasement, or punishment. great is the reward.

i usually think people need to smile when they look at art. but what if they need to cry? what if i need to? or am...
so i painted a bottle full of tears. inspired by the words of a king of ages past, in his cry for God to remember him and see his pain. "put my tears in your bottle" he asks. make my sorrow a priceless and delicate collection in your heaven! how beautiful! so i painted it. and shared it with my OpenStudio group. one of the dear friends cried, and didnt know why it moved her like that. i'm so honored that it did. so honored.

the writing is in hebrew, "śî·māh dim·‘ā·ṯî ḇə·nō·ḏe·ḵā" - put my tears in your bottle.


i dont feel like rehashing a different blog i just finished (yeah, i have two that i dont tend to. the other is my more private thoughts, while i am using this one to focus on art as my sole subject), so i'll share the link, and say that i think it is nearly time to change things... art should move us, not just be something we glance at and pass judgement on (be it good or bad).

loquat seeds

oh how excited am i? talking w/ the ladies last thurs one asked me what all i had done w/ the loquats i'd collected, if i've made any jam or such things. there's a lovely tree outside the building, just bursting w/ the little orange things, so i've gathered quite a few...and they are delicious. but in conjunction w/ that conversation was jewelry making, as i had just reworked a few pieces. this lead to a wonderment about how lovely the loquat seeds are. which brought us to the idea of working them into my jewelry... i'm so excited. but i said that already.
i'm not sure what they will turn into, i will drill holes in some, wrap wire around others, clump them and keep them separated...earrings and necklaces... and i think i'll use some metal leafing on a few, wouldnt that be neat?

hm, now i need a theme song.

ah, spring in texas means beautiful flowers...if it rains. thankfully it has this year. and spring time in texas also means allergies. sigh, last year was my first bout with the sniffles and watery eyes, even though i've lived here my whole life. so this year, i guess i can take it as a sign that it is official, my nose hates something in the air right now.
but my eyes are in love. my mother gardens in a natural way, and her favorite flowers are the wildflowers. this means that no matter where they pop up, she will care for it and watch it grow. no matter where it is. did i say that already? this year it brought a whole world of butterflies that we've not had before (yes, i will go ahead and say it, i live at home still). the caterpillars love these things, and so do i (though i've not taken the time to investigate what they are):

i hadnt put two and two together till i was shooting some cacti blossoms - looking at the yellow flower, i thought to myself, "now doesnt that remind you of a rose?" followed shortly by, "oh. yellow rose of texas. i'm brilliant." i dont think anyone had ever told me directly that it was the cactus flower that is referred to as the yellow rose of texas, so i'm kinda proud of myself for figuring it out.

this one on the right, i love that there is a bug in it. i wouldnt re-shoot that for the world. not to say that if i found it in my room i wouldnt squash it. hm.





then last for the moment, but not least.......

.....if i were a superhero....
i finally figured out who/what i would be!
DamselFly
and my colors would be black and purple.
i would wear a fabulous, intricate lace mask.
my power would be.... uhm. well, i will have to work on that part.

i share this because i know we all think about these things. be honest, you've had the thought, "if i had superpowers, what would they be?" then you go into your costume and colors and sidekick

(who ever imagines that they are the sidekick? right.)

i forgot to give it a title...there. done.

i have no idea where to begin. at least you know i'll always be honest with you.

this is a place for me to face my fears, to step into a world where i have to admit my convictions and then act upon them. if i get an idea for an image, or am having a hard time bringing myself to finish a piece, i will share it here. i'm so glad to have some people in my life that not only encouraged me to start this blog, but also will hold me accountable to maintain it and grow by it. you know who you are.

for those who have noticed i dont capitalize or properly punctuate, i'm sorry. at least i try to spell everything correctly and use the proper word (there/their/they're, then/than, etc - oh my goodness it drives me crazy when people misuse those). i will, however, capitalize God/Jesus and the corresponding Him's and He's. "i" never needs to be capitalized. just sayin'.

i'll do my best to keep you up to date w/ what i'm working on, posting pictures and whatnot. my fave photos will likely show up too. i unloaded the latest wildflower/butterfly pics i took in the backyard and noticed the count my camera keeps had started over. that would mean i've taken over 10,000 photographs. granted, 9,000 are probably not that great, but i should hope the rest are considerably fabulous.

hm, random thought (which you will become accustomed to soon enough), i think i like the no-caps typing style because it is childlike. we need to remember simplicity and innocence. and i've come to understand the definition of innocence not to be an ignorance of wrong, but the full knowledge of it without the ability to be charged guilty. longing for childhood innocence in adulthood is attainable. it is one of my many pure hopes.